Guiding Light

The path is dark
The road unknown
The journey treacherous
Upon which I've borne

My eyes can't see
But my heart knows the way
I lay my trust in you
As your flame would never sway

You brighten my way
You guide me through the night
I surrender to you
You are my guiding light

Autumn

As the Wind Gods from the North
Start arriving in my backyard
As the days grow shorter
And longer nights hold guard
As the air turns crisp
And leaves cast a golden halo
My heart is filled with solitude
And my soul embarks on a journey
A journey to find the real me
As I pay my gratitude
To all the beautiful seasons that we see.

Radha Vallabh

Color me Blue
I am incomplete without you
Your music rings in my ears
And your name sings in my heart
Vallabh...Vallabh...Vallabh.

तूझ्याच रंगात रंगून गेले
तूझ्याच सूरात चिम्ब भिजले
राहिले माझीच मी कुठे रे
तुझेच नाव अंतरी वसले
वल्लभ...वल्लभ....वल्लभ....

Rain or Shine

A drop of rain hanging softly on the tip of a leaf
A drop of dew shining brightly on a grass sheaf
The fragrance of earth after the first showers
The fragrance exuding from morning flowers
A heart that longs for something unknown when the clouds darken
Is joyous and exuberant when the day brightens
So tell me, Oh, tell me
Who is more beautiful
Nature in form of a maiden who has just stepped out of a shower
Or she who is all dressed up to be in her lover's arms forever

Women's Day

March 8th is celebrated as "Women's Day" world over. This year it was celebrated with the same fervor and enthusiasm with the media noting achievements of highly acclaimed women in various fields and industries. It made me proud and inspired, to read about all these women who have conquered the heights of success.Reading their stories about enduring struggles and conquering will power made me look at them with respect for all that they have gone through and for all that they have achieved.

And then I realized, it was a very familiar feeling. A feeling that I experience almost everyday. It was a feeling that I get when I look, talk, hear and see women who touch my life on an everyday basis. These women are my friends, my relatives, my acquaintances, my co-workers. Each and everyone of them is unique in her own special way. Some hold high posts in corporate offices and some are stay at home moms, some are entrepreneurs and some are artists, some are professionals and some are social workers. And all this while going through a complex routine called life. Each one of them has her own struggles and her own victories. They are walking this rope of life while balancing their professions, relationships and kids with a huge smile on their faces. Each one of them has this innate strength and power to face what life brings to them, determined to make their lives happy and fulfilling in the path they have chosen for themselves.

And these are the women who are my true inspirations. They help me in their own unique ways, knowingly or unknowingly, to carry on with my own life. They are the ones who give me strength when I feel weak. They amaze and inspire me with their attitude towards life. Each one of them has a lesson to teach. These are real women with faces, voices, families and lives. Ones whom I can relate to. Ones whose lives are not very different from mine and yet so very different.

This women's day, I would like to thank all you wonderful girls for just being you and touching my life in some special way which has helped me get closer to understanding the true meaning of living life.

Who am "I"

This is the question that has been asked by mankind probably ever since the beginning of time (If ever such a thing as "Beginning of of time" exists). I myself have always wondered about the question, though not as intensely till one night last month. It was an amazing experience which really hit me hard. (I purposely don't say "got me thinking" because our capacity to think and find answers to questions of spirituality is still in its infancy. That is the reason why most of the ancient Indian scriptures are compilations by different great sages and don't have authors. But more on that later).
So back to our original question - Who am I. Last month I had to stay home by myself since hubby and children were traveling for 3 weeks. This was absolutely the first time that I had ever stayed without my kids and I did not realize how difficult it would be until they left. Next day itself, I came down with very high fever, cough and cold. It was so bad that I could hardly get out of the bed for 4 days. I was missing my kids extremely. And they were missing me too. Now, third day early morning I had a very beautiful experience. "I" could experience my kids sleeping peacefully next to me. "I" looked at them, cuddled them and started thinking, how's that possible. The experience was so very real that I started telling myself that maybe my kids leaving me and going with their dad was just a dream. Only my husband has gone and would be back in 3 weeks. Thinking that "I" got out of the bed and went to another room which was also very very real. And then "I" heard someone doing the laundry. "I" went downstairs and saw that my husband was doing laundry. I was very very surprised and knew that they had returned in 2 days. So it was definitely not a dream. I wanted to pinch my self to make me realize that all this was real. And I knew it was real. Then I started asking hubby about how come they returned in 2 days. And as soon as he started explaining which made me use my brain to think, I woke up to realize that it WAS a dream.
But was it a dream. Absolutely not. I know I experienced each and every moment of it. I know I touched my kids to cuddle them. I know I walked into the other room, heard the voices from the laundry room and then spoke with my husband.
And then if I was still fast asleep in bed, who was this "me" who was experiencing all these wonderful things. And then who was this person who was judging whether it was a dream. If it was just a dream which traditionally means visions of what we think, which essentially means it is an activity of the brain at a subconscious level, then my brain should have known that it "is" a dream and should have just left it at that. But that was not the case. My brain was confused because I was experiencing each and every moment of my dream with all my senses - touch, sight and sounds. It was the real "me" experiencing all these things whereas my brain which is a product of my physical being was trying to reason out everything. In any case I feel I experienced the real me for the first time. The energy, the light, the consciousness - was something that I had never known before.
Maybe this is just a small step towards finding the real "me". In any case it was absolutely wonderful.